M is for Marriage

Ladybird Johnson Wildlife Center, Austin TX

Ladybird Johnson Wildlife Center, Austin TX

I like being married.  I like it even better that I’m married to someone who gets me.

I read an article yesterday about how it’s important to have boundaries in marriage, and the author stated that she thinks everyone should have boundaries like trying not to be alone with someone of the opposite sex, and never having private conversations with the other sex because people are weak, and it can lead to infidelity.

I’m glad these boundaries work for the author and her husband, but I don’t agree that those are the right boundaries for everyone.

The fact is that most of my friends are men, and most of my husband’s friends are women.  We both have a mix of both, of course, but that’s just kind of how it works out for us.

My husband gets that I like spending time alone, and that it has nothing to do with him.  He gets that I’m not really a morning person, and that I’d rather stay up late than get up early.  He gets that I complain a lot, but if you can ignore my complaints, I’m helpful and pleasant.  He gets that I like to read and write more than I like doing just about anything else.

My husband isn’t perfect; he’s got plenty of flaws.  But then, so do I.  What’s important isn’t our strengths or weaknesses, but that they work for us.  There’s no one size fits all when it comes to any kind of relationship.

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3 comments on “M is for Marriage

  1. Debs Carey says:

    Doree, I’m with you on the boundaries within marriage (or any serious relationship). I am amazed with those who think its necessary to avoid members of the opposite gender in order to stay faithful. Surely there’s either something wrong with the individual, or something wrong in the relationship. Respecting differences is so important as you highlight.

    • doreeweller says:

      Well, while I couldn’t have a partner who wanted me to avoid other men, I think that what’s important is that both partners have the same boundaries, not necessarily what the actual boundaries are. Thanks for your comment!

  2. grazona says:

    I love, love, love this post. I agree with you that “getting” each other is so important. My other half and I are both introverts and it’s HUGE that we understand each other’s need for space and downtime.

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