Book Challenges- Week 22

Popsugar Challenge

(18/50)

A book with an LGBTQ+ protagonist: None of the Above, by IW Gregorio (YA LGBTQ+): Krissy is a popular girl, the homecoming queen, with a super hot boyfriend. When she finds out she’s intersex, her world changes.

Overall, I liked this book, but I didn’t love it, and I could have. I’m going to keep this review spoiler-free, so read on, if you’re interested.

What I liked: The book was written by a doctor and was inspired by what she imagined it would be like to find out you’re intersex, after meeting an intersex teen girl. That means that the doctor parts are probably accurate. I didn’t know anything about being intersex before reading this book, other than information I peripherally heard from the Olympian who was challenged as being female based on her chromosomes. I thought it was just about chromosomes and didn’t realize that there can also be internal male sex organs, which just complicates the issue more. I thought it was well done as far as imagining some of the emotions that someone, on finding out their diagnosis, would go through.

What I didn’t like: When Krissy’s secret gets out, she’s bullied. (That’s on the back cover, so it’s not a spoiler.) And that was fine. We all know kids bully anyone different. What I didn’t like was how some of her other relationships changed because of her diagnosis and reaction to it. It felt written just to create drama. I also thought her romantic relationship was way too convenient and predictible. I definitely wanted her to find love because I think that books should set a good example, and positive relationships are part of that. And her romantic interest was great. But it all came together too conveniently for me. (My full review with spoilers is on Goodreads, so if you’re curious about what I’m specifically talking about, feel free to check it out.)

What I’m not sure of: I read the reviews on Goodreads, and though I didn’t see a review from anyone identifying as intersex, many members of the LGBTQ+ community didn’t like it. In my mind, that’s not a reason to skip it. Some of their reasons didn’t resonate with me, but others did. I just wish that when the author talked about her expereience writing the book, she had mentioned if she had anyone who actually was intersex read the book. I wish I knew how close the experience is to the story of someone who’s been through it.

While I Was Reading Challenge

(4/12)- No progress this week

The Unread Shelf

Running Total: 14

5 Classic Books

(1/5) Finally!

The Stand, by Stephen King (horror): I read the uncut version, which clocked in at 1153 pages. Though I enjoyed it, there were times I honestly started to wonder if I was ever going to get through it. Why is it that reading one 1200 page book takes so much longer than four 300 page books?

This book never got boring, to me, but it did drag on a bit in spots. It was great getting to know all the major characters in such a deep way, but I don’t know if I would have missed it if some of that had been cut out. I probably would have liked the original version better because for most of his books, I think Stephen King’s editor is asleep at the wheel. I still love his books, but I’d like them more if there were less of them.

Even though I knew good had to triumph over evil, this book still kept me on the edge of my seat, and I was desperate to know who’d live and who’d die, if Frannie’s baby would live, and what would happen to Tom. I can tell you that the ending was one of the most satisfying ones I’ve ever read.

I’m so glad I read this and irritated with myself for putting it off as long as I did, but it was an endeavor. It took me almost a month to get through, though I did take breaks and read other books in between. I love to read, so usually, when I’m done, I don’t feel like I’ve accomplished any particular thing. With this book though, I’m totally giving myself a pat on the back!

Miscellaneous Reading

The Hunger Games trilogy, by Suzanne Collins (YA dystopia/ fantasy): I was traveling, and I needed a good audiobook. Since I do best with rereads, The Hunger Games seemed like the perfect travel book. It really was great to relive it on audio, though I didn’t love the narrator at first. She had an English accent, and I kept thinking, “Wasn’t Katniss from what used to be the US?” Eventually, the narrator grew on me because she differentiated voices so well. She slurred Haymitch just enough to show he was drunk, but not so much that I coudln’t understand him.

The only thing that annoyed me with The Hunger Games on audio is that I didn’t like the present tense narration. I never even noticed it when I was reading the books, but on audio, it stuck out in a bad way.

I did enjoy the reread though, so much that I came home and read the other two. The books are just as fun as I remembered.

Abandoned

None this week.

2018 Running Total: 66

Have you made any progress on your TBR or book challenges? What’s the longest book you’ve ever read?

The Dark Side of Acceptance

On Wellness Wednesdays, I post on a wellness topic.

Sea World, San Diego
Photo Credit: Doree Weller

I wouldn’t say that my high school had a bullying problem.  We were a small, rural school.  And yet I was bullied for my weight in high school.  One of my friends was bullied for the way she looked as well.  I recently wrote a story about bullying, and a friend of mine, who has been out of high school far less time than me, said, “That’s not how it works anymore.  Now, it’s the fat black gay kid who’s the popular kid.”

I had seen this trend in the new 21 Jump Street, but I wasn’t sure if it was for real or not.  When I asked another friend of mine about it, she said that it has gotten better, though it’s not quite like my other friend said.

I know that bullying still exists.  I know this because I still see online articles about kids who have attempted or completed suicide based on how bad bullying gets.  I’ve seen adults bully other adults, so I know it doesn’t just come out of nowhere.

Recently, I read an article about how Planet Fitness revoked a woman’s gym membership for not following their “No Judgement Zone” policy.  The woman reportedly got upset when a person she thought was a man entered the locker room.  The person in question is actually transgendered, and identifies as female.  The customer who objected returned to the gym multiple days to tell other gym members that Planet Fitness allows “men” in the women’s dressing rooms, which was what ended in her having her membership revoked.

I’m actually not here to weigh in on that particular issue, but I provided a summary of the story to set the tone for what I do want to talk about.  This article was published as a link on Facebook, and I was curious about the comments.  There were the expected arguments on both sides.  One woman stated that she agreed with the woman who didn’t feel safe with a “man” in her dressing room, and that she would never go to Planet Fitness as a result.  She expressed herself in a logical and appropriate manner.  Other people attacked her, calling her names and telling her that she was being “intolerant.”  They put her down and said things about her that they couldn’t possibly know, saying that she was a bad Christian (she never mentioned religion).

Several times, this woman responded and defended her views, saying that she has the right to feel the way she feels about it, and each time, she was met with a barrage of negative statements from others.

This woman was bullied.

I’m an LGBTQ ally.  I believe that everyone should have the same rights.  BUT, when someone disagrees with my opinion, I don’t have the right to bully them, and neither does anyone else.

There is a big difference between expressing an opinion by stating that you won’t patronize an establishment because you don’t believe in the way they do things and saying that you wish harm to a group of people.  The former is an adult reaction to something that offends you.  The latter is extremist, childish, and just plain wrong.

True acceptance means that we accept the respectful opinions of everyone.  It does not mean that we agree.  It does not mean that we bully.  It means that we allow others to express their opinions.  If we want to have an intelligent, adult discussion with dissenting opinions, that’s wonderful.  That’s what it’s all about.  Acceptance does not mean that everyone has to “accept” your opinion as correct.

By bullying the woman who expressed her opinion, all commenters did was cement her opinions.  People don’t change their minds because other people put them down or shame them.  People change their minds through open and honest discussion, along with respectful arguments that make them think differently.

Next time someone gives an opinion you don’t agree with, listen to them, respectfully and without judgement.  Then give yours.  I believe that this respectful meeting of minds is the way that we can truly promote peace and equality.

What are your thoughts?